


Invisible Wounds

by phantomthief_fee



Category: Bendy and the Ink Machine
Genre: Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Joey's an utter asshole and Sammy is not okay, M/M, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:07:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21958612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phantomthief_fee/pseuds/phantomthief_fee
Summary: Sammy was different after getting out of the studio and Norman wanted to know why
Relationships: Sammy Lawrence/Joey Drew (Mentioned), Sammy Lawrence/Norman Polk
Comments: 2
Kudos: 76





	Invisible Wounds

**Anonymous asked: Prompt: Sammy was in a bad relationship with Joey and Norman finds out. You decide what happens!**

Oooooh. Oooh boy. This is gonna be something.

Trigger warning for abuse and suicidal ideation.

* * *

Norman had noticed a change in Sammy since they’d been freed from the ink. He was quieter now, and much jumpier. Loud noises sent him running for his room. He flinched when people raised their voices at him. Norman wasn’t entirely sure what had happened, but he was worried.

After Susie had disappeared, Joey had started asking to see Sammy quite a lot. That had been about the time when Sammy had started lashing out at everyone around him. Norman had started looking into the strange behavior displayed by both Sammy and Joey, discovering the cage that held the copy of Alice Angel that Susie had become and, well, that had been it for him. He hadn’t been present to see Sammy’s spiral into madness, which he was actually rather glad of now.

In any case, Norman was rather concerned about Sammy. They had all been harmed by their time in the studio, but few had been as completely changed as Sammy. Norman wanted to know just what had happened so he could help Sammy. He hated seeing the former music director like this, a shell of his former self.

So, one day he approached him. Sammy was holed up in one of Henry’s spare bedrooms, sitting on the windowsill and staring out at the world beyond. It was a beautiful day outside. The sun was shining and the sky was a vibrant blue, peppered with powderpuff clouds. Sammy spent a lot of time in this bedroom, either sleeping or staring out the window. Susie had tried to coax him out a few times to play music with her, but he’d declined each time.

“Can I join you?” Norman asked, stopping when he stood behind Sammy.

Sammy shrugged slightly. “If you like.”

He shifted a bit so that Norman could sit beside him on the windowsill. They sat in silence for a moment or two, Sammy watching the window and Norman watching him.

“Are you alright?” Norman asked.

“Are any of us alright?” Sammy replied listlessly, his gaze still on the scene outside.

“That’s not what I asked.”

Sammy didn’t say anything for a second, then laughed weakly. A small smile crossed his features, far wearier than anything Norman had ever seen on Sammy’s face before.

“I suppose it was foolish of me to avoid the question,” he said, finally looking at Norman. “No, I’m not alright.”

Norman’s heart ached at the look in Sammy’s eyes. There was no light there. It was as though he was a dead man walking.

“As I said, I don’t think any of us are alright,” Sammy continued. “But I think I did get off rather lightly in regards to some of the others. Such as you.”

Norman couldn’t help but be a bit surprised when Sammy reached out, his fingers ghosting over Norman’s chest where the speaker had been. The only other person Norman had seen Sammy touch since getting out was Susie. The two often held one another when they were feeling particularly bad.

“I’m sorry about what happened to you,” Sammy whispered. “You didn’t deserve that.”

“None of us deserved what happened to us,” Norman replied, resting his hand on Sammy’s. Sammy’s instinctively jerked back, clutching his hand to his chest.

“What happened to you?” Norman asked before he could stop himself.

Sammy hunched his shoulders, drawing into himself as though he hoped he would disappear if he tried hard enough.

“It was my fault,” He mumbled, drawing his knees up to his chest. “I deserved it. I deserved all of it. Henry should have left me to die there.”

“No, you didn’t.” Norman’s voice was gentle but firm. “None of us deserved what happened to us, Sammy. None of us. That includes you.”

“You don’t know what I did.” Sammy started to shake, beginning to pick at his clothing and scratch at his arms. “I’m a monster. I deserved everything that happened to me. I deserved to suffer like that. I’m a bad person.”

“Sammy!” Norman’s voice came out a bit sharper than intended, causing Sammy to begin to cry, covering his ears and apologizing. But it wasn’t Norman’s name he said as he apologized.

It was Joey’s.

“I’m sorry, Joey!” He sobbed, folding in on himself even more. “I’m sorry! I’ll do better! I promise! I can do better!” He shook and sobbed, an utter mess, begging for Joey’s forgiveness.

Norman felt a boiling rage building in his heart. He had seen these signs before. He knew what this came from.

“Sammy.” He lowered his voice. “Sammy, I want you to take some deep breaths.” Sammy took a few shallow, hiccuping breaths before continuing to hyperventilate and sob.

“Sammy, I said _deep_ breaths.” Norman couldn’t help but laugh a little, which caused Sammy’s eyes to dart up. His shoulders lowered a bit when he saw Norman’s gentle smile.

“Like this.” Norman took a few deep breaths himself to demonstrate. Sammy watched him, taking a few unsteady breaths.

“That’s good,” Norman said. “Keep going.”

It took a few minutes of deep breathing for Sammy to be calm once more, although he continued to press himself into the corner of the windowsill in an attempt to make himself smaller.

“Do you feel better?” Norman asked.

“A bit.” Sammy nodded.

“Good.” Norman gave him a smile. “I was worried about you.”

“You shouldn’t be.” Sammy’s gaze dropped away and he hid his face behind his knees. “I’m a monster.”

“Just what did you do that’s so bad?” Norman moved closer. “It can’t be worse than all the shit Joey pulled.”

Sammy was quiet for a very long time. Norman was just about to leave, thinking his aggressive questioning had caused Sammy to lock up, when the former music director began to speak.

“I felt…dreadful after Susie was replaced.” He began, his voice muffled by his legs. “She was so distraught and…And angry at _me_. Not Joey. **_Me_**.” He tensed, his hands gripping the fabric of his shirt. “I started thinking that…maybe it was my fault. That I had done something to get her replaced. You know how Joey would do that, punish someone else to get back at another.”

“Yeah, I remember.” Norman nodded solemnly.

“You see…I’d had a fight with Joey the week before Susie was replaced. I’d gotten angry because Joey had neglected to inform me of another deadline,” Sammy continued. “It was a fight we’d had a dozen times before. But I couldn’t stop thinking…That maybe that was why Susie had been replaced. I couldn’t stop thinking that it was my fault.” His breath hitched, a sob tearing its way from his throat.

“I’m guessing Joey was more than happy to let you think that.” A growl entered Norman’s voice.

“He never forced me to do anything, though,” Sammy said quickly, looking up at Norman with a shaky smile. “I did it all of my own free will. I helped to kill Jack. I helped to sacrifice Grant and Lacie and Shawn. I deserved what I got. I deserved all of it!” He looked manic now, but in a very sad way. “I’m as bad as Joey! I helped him hurt all of you! I deserve to die! I-”

“Sammy.” Norman cut him off. Sammy stopped his yelling, shrinking back as he prepared to be yelled at. Norman’s heart broke at the fear in Sammy’s eyes. If he hadn’t wanted to kill Joey before, he sure did now.

He wrapped his arms around Sammy, pulling him close and beginning to gently stroke his hair.

“You don’t deserve to die,” he said. “You didn’t deserve any of what happened to you, Sammy. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry Joey made you feel this way.”

Despite himself, he was starting to cry. He held Sammy closer. How had he not seen that this was happening? Seeing Norman crying made Sammy start to cry too, unsure why Norman was crying in the first place.

The two of them held each other and cried for quite a while. It felt good to cry for both of them. When they stopped crying, they just sat there. Sammy buried his face in Norman’s chest, taking comfort in Norman’s warmth and gentle embrace.

“Joey used you.” Norman finally said. “It doesn’t excuse what you did, I’ll admit that, but you were a victim in this just as much as the rest of us.” He pressed a kiss to the top of Sammy’s head. “You’re a good man, Sammy Lawrence. I have always believed that and I will always believe that.”

“I don’t deserve your trust,” Sammy murmured, although his voice lacked conviction. Norman kept stroking his hair and Sammy closed his eyes. He could hear Norman’s heartbeat.

“I know I can’t make you feel better right now,” Norman kissed his head again. “But I’m going to help you. I promise.” It was going to take a long time, he knew that, but he was going to undo the damage Joey had done. He was going to help Sammy be happy again.

**Author's Note:**

> If you would like to request a prompt, check out my tumblr queenofcats17


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